Michael Nobbs

Tag: morning ritual

  • Dealing With Last Page / First Page Anxiety

    A view of a tea tray arranged on a bed covered with a crocheted blanket. On the tray is a patterned hen tray mat, and resting on the mat are a white milk jug, an orange insulated mug, a tall stainless-steel flask, a lime-green teapot, and a slim reading light rising just behind them. In front of the tray lies an open sketchbook. **On its left page is a dense pencil drawing of some of the items from the tray — the reading light and the milk jug — shown sitting on the hen-patterned mat.** On its right page, centred within a large area of blank paper, is a small hand-drawn version of the Stanley logo — a winged bear wearing a crown — with “STANLEY. Since 1913” written beneath it. Warm lamplight falls across the scene.

    This morning I woke with a tightness around the idea of making my morning drawing — a physical resistance to picking up my sketchbook. I’ve been working backwards through this sketchbook, so although I’d reached what was, for me, the final blank spread, it was also the first pair of pages after opening the cover. I’d been feeling it coming for days and, unusually, it had been haunting me.

    I’ve been working this way through sketchbooks for more than two and a half years — since I first returned to drawing after Mary Gordon died. It was a strategy born out of needing to avoid the paralysing pressure of a perfect first page. At first I simply chose random places to draw, but soon I settled into working from back to front. It has served me well, but with this sketchbook that first-page paralysis has reared its head again — maybe because of the recent stress around my health and all the newness.

    Interestingly, in worrying about meeting this page, I’d forgotten about the power of routine. Simply making my tea, arranging my tea-things on the tray, and bringing it back to bed found me reaching for my sketchbook and pencil and beginning to draw. I stayed gentle and started with something small and contained: the Stanley logo on my insulated mug. I’ve been wanting to draw it for a while, and its sparseness felt like the right entry point. Once that was on the page, the drawing grew easily — the reading light, the illustrated hen mat, the milk jug. Familiar shapes. Familiar company.

    I decided not to add any colour, and as I dated the drawing to mark it as finished, I felt a quiet satisfaction at having made it through that moment of resistance — and at having filled another sketchbook, one drawing at a time, from back to front.

    A close-up view of an open sketchbook resting on a bed. On the left page is a dense line drawing made with pencil showing a reading light and a milk jug, both sitting on a patterned hen tray mat. The hens form a repeating background across the whole page. On the right page, centred within a large area of blank paper, is a small hand-drawn version of the Stanley logo — a winged bear wearing a crown — with “STANLEY. Since 1913” written beneath it. The date “17–11–25” appears in the lower corner. Above the sketchbook the edges of the tray from the drawing can be seen showing the base of the reading lamp and part of the hen patterned tray mat from the drawing, along with a short pencil with a gold point guard and what looks like the base of an orange mug and a silver flask. Warm lamplight softens the edges of the paper.

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  • Tea Made in a Teapot (Not a Teabag in Sight!)

    Sketchbook open to a drawing of a teapot, oat milk carton, and mug, placed beside the real objects — green teapot, stainless-steel flask, and mug on a patterned tablecloth. The handwritten text in the sketchbook reads: ‘Tea made in a teapot (not a teabag in sight!!). The first time since Covid. A sign that things are improving.

    Today’s Tea-Tray drawing, Tea Made in a Teapot (Not a Teabag in Sight!)

    Notes: A drawing of my morning tea-tray scene — teapot, Oatly carton, Go Gently mug and flask accompanied by handwritten text:

    “Tea made in a teapot (not a teabag in sight!!). The first time since Covid. A sure sign that things are improving.”

    This feels like gentle milestone marking recovery and the quiet return of ritual; I hope that the drawing combines a little humour, care, and gratitude within the familiar rhythm of morning tea.

    Sketchbook drawing of a teapot, oat milk carton, and mug. Handwritten text reads: ‘Tea made in a teapot (not a teabag in sight!!). The first time since Covid. A sign that things are improving.’ The page captures a return to ritual and gentle humour after illness.

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