Michael Nobbs

Tag: ME Crash

Studio Diary entries written during periods when my ME/CFS symptoms are particularly bad. Drawings, thoughts and small moments from days spent resting, waiting and hoping to feel better.

  • Resting, drawing and waiting to feel better

    An early morning drawing setup on a bed, illuminated by the warm yellow glow of a small reading light. An open pocket sketchbook rests on a colourful crocheted blanket, displaying a black ink drawing of an orange Stanley mug and a packet of sugar-free chocolate chip cookies, surrounded by hens from the blue patterned cloth on the tea tray. Behind the sketchbook, the real mug and packet of biscuits sit on the tray alongside two pens and the reading light. The drawing echoes the objects arranged behind it, creating a playful connection between the sketchbook and the scene being drawn.
    An open pocket sketchbook resting on a colourful crocheted blanket, showing a black ink drawing spread across two pages. The drawing depicts an orange Stanley mug and a large packet of sugar-free Zero chocolate chip cookies, surrounded by loosely drawn hens copied from the patterned cloth on the tea tray. The bold, slightly wobbly lines overlap in places, with the mug and biscuit packet dominating the composition. The date, 10-10-26, is written in the top right corner. Above the sketchbook, the real biscuit packet, two pens and part of the blue hen-patterned tray cloth are visible.

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  • Mostly being still

    In the midst of this ME crash, I’m mostly being quite still, but yesterday evening George drove me into town for some fish and chips on the seafront. I’m beyond delighted to have discovered that I can eat a few chips without my blood sugar levels spiking!

    Afterwards, I took a few steps from the car to be buffeted by the wind and watch the sun set.

    Lovely.

    A loose black ink drawing across two pages of an open pocket sketchbook. On the left is the side of a parked car, with its doors, windows and wheel arch outlined in bold, wandering lines. On the right is a large, expressive profile of a person looking towards the car. The drawing has an overlapping, almost abstract quality. Handwritten text in the bottom right reads, “I eat some of George’s chips and he has the batter from my fish.” The date, 9-10-26, appears underneath. The sketchbook rests on a red and white patterned surface.
    A loose black ink drawing across two pages of an open pocket sketchbook, showing the artist's reflection in the passenger-side wing mirror of a car as he sits looking out towards the sea. His face, wearing glasses and a striped beanie, is framed by the sweeping, curved outline of the mirror, with parts of the car loosely sketched around it. Across the top, handwritten text reads, “Watching the big sea after fish and chips.” Further handwritten notes down the right-hand side describe eating fish and chips in the car at South Beach and wondering whether this might become a new habit. The drawing is dated 9-10-26.

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  • A 4.00 am pool of light

    An open pocket sketchbook resting on a colourful crocheted blanket in front of a screen showing a moustachioed man wearing a grey cable-knit jumper and red neckerchief. The sketchbook contains a portrait of the man, drawn in black ink with touches of red, turquoise and grey against an olive-green background. Handwritten text reads “New YouTube obsession. Henry did it”, alongside the date 9-10-26 and the time 4.30 am. To the right, an orange Stanley mug and a black pen rest on a yellow Moomin tray decorated with illustrations of Moomin characters and flowers. The scene is warmly lit.
    A close-up of an open pocket sketchbook resting on a crocheted blanket in shades of cream, rust and blue. A black ink portrait of a man with a curled moustache stretches across both pages, with touches of red, turquoise and grey on his clothing and a textured olive-green background. Handwritten lettering on the left reads “New YouTube obsession. Henry did it”, with “4.30 am” written vertically below. The date 9-10-26 appears on the right. Behind the sketchbook, part of a screen shows the grey cable-knit jumper of the man being drawn, with a pale blue typewriter visible in the background.

    I’m reluctantly coming to the conclusion that I’m in the midst of an ME crash.

    What I’m also seeing is that my 4.00 am drawing habit is actually a little oasis for my foggy brain and uncomfortable body. There is a certain amount of clarity and even some energy as I sit in bed awake in the small hours.

    For weeks now I’ve been waiting for this time to dissolve into a more regular — more acceptable — sleep pattern. But today, as I sit with my tea, drawing and listening to the rain, it feels like a little pool of light to enjoy and cherish.

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